Home > Uncategorized > The NYC Marathon is this weekend. And I will be…on the couch.

The NYC Marathon is this weekend. And I will be…on the couch.

To a certain degree, a marathon piques my interest. Not to participate in, mind you, unless participation means watching it on TV as I’m polishing off my second drink when the elite runners are within 5 miles of the finish line before noon. So yeah, I do my part!

Actually just thinking about running 5 miles, let alone 26.2, makes me feel exhausted. The only remedy: scotch.

Much better.

But after reading this article I learned something about those long-distance runners.

They’re more insane than I imagined.

Shalane Flanagan, a crazy person who has set American records in short-distance running and is an Olympic bronze medalist, said this:

I’ve been thinking of this for years. Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always dreamed of running the marathon. Now it’s almost here, and it’s a little scary putting all your eggs in one basket.

Seriously? There are little boys and girls out there that dream of running a marathon? Craaazzzzy.

But what was really interesting (not really) was that the younger folk (crazy runners) are now looking at marathon’s as being cool and hip (coo-coo!):

The marathon might be cool and hip, but its fundamental puzzles — and horrors — remain unchanged.

The marathon stands nearly alone in that it is a competition — inevitably, a painful one — that one does not practice over and over to prepare for the event.

A pitcher or quarterback throws a pitch or pass he will attempt in a game hundreds of times in the week leading up to it. A basketball player shoots hundreds of free throws or three-pointers. In track, a 100-meter runner can run that distance many times in preparation.

But the marathon takes months and months of preparation and, during that time, a runner will never run the precise distance (26.2 miles) and pace (around 5:32, in Flanagan’s case, translating to a 2:25 marathon) that he or she will on race day.

Okay, so that is kind of interesting. I was always under the impression that a runner had to run a marathon before running a marathon.

Even Fluffy is exhausted just thinking about it

They are tremendous athletes and I respect anyone that is crazy enough to punish themselves with an activity that the human body has no right in being subjected to.

Now excuse me while I finish off this bottle of Famous Grouse.

-Grousejuiceboy

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