Archive for September, 2010

Star Wars Coming to 3D: The Search for More Money Continues…

September 29, 2010 6 comments

So it appears that Star Wars is getting the 3D treatment.  Starting in 2012, George Lucas and Co. will release each of the six movies in order, one per year.  I’ll give you a second to do to the math to figure out how long it will be before we get to A New Hope…

Finished?  Yeah, that’s right!  2015.  Get excited everyone! 

That’s three years of the prequels again, folks, and since this rerelease is dependent on the previous movies being profitable, that means we all need to spend enough money on the Episode 1-3 garbage heap to ensure we get the original trilogy in 3D.   That means seeing Jar Jar step in poop (in three dimensions) and Anakin talking about his distaste for sand (in three dimensions!).  Greeaaaat.  But the prequels aside, do we really need any of these movies in 3D at all?  Even the good ones?  Read more after the jump.

Read more…

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We predicted a JLo comeback and here….she….comes!

September 24, 2010 1 comment

Gobble, gobble!

Making sure to toot our own horn when the opportunity presents itself, The Island is taking pride in the fact that back in JANUARY, we called the JLo comeback and warned y’all about the impending world domination by Jenny From The Block.

Oh, you...!

Along with predicting another Aniston movie bomb (came true), more jail time for LiLo (duh!) and the fashion craze dubbed “Puri’tans” (give it time!) we do pretty well here in seeing and commenting on trends that are about to smack us all upside the head.

Ēadig, þec tō mētenne!

JLo signed onto American Idol for $12 million this week. Rumor has it that she wanted $18 million plus a movie deal with FOX. After getting their reply of “Go F Yourself”, JLo accepted the network’s offer and took the paltry sum.

Everybody mad at the rocks that I wear 😦

Where is this all going, except to say that, back in January, we warned you that “before we all know it, she’ll sashay her way into every city, every town, every where!”?

It leads to our latest prediction:

The end of American Idol is near.

That and one of the Cusack’s will lose a leg to a shark in Summer 2011.

I'm not going to waste my time arguing with a man who's lining up to be a hot lunch.

It will be a spectacular crash!

And you heard it here first.


Related Posts:

Original JLo

JLo Update

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For Your Friday Viewing…Sadness? Julianne Moore Loves to Cry

September 23, 2010 2 comments

Wow, I had no idea she cried this many times in her movies.  Is it wrong that the more she cries the more I laugh at her?

Does that make me a sick man?

–Cap’n Sadsack

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Monkey Dolls: My Eyes are Burning!

September 23, 2010 Leave a comment

The habitat for our simian friends is shrinking across the globe. Many are endangered and on the brink of extinction. It’s all very upsetting. But THIS:

…is NOT the answer.

Keep reading…

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OMG, Look at Drew Carey

September 21, 2010 5 comments

Have you seen this?  Have you heard about this?  Drew Carey…is THIN.  Eighty pounds thinner to be exact.  To say the viewers of yesterday’s The Price is Right were shocked would be an…well, it would probably be an overstatement, actually.  Most viewers are, after all, stoned teenagers and half-blind nursing home patients.

But I’m shocked!  Aren’t you?

Now here’s where I’d tell you that he lost the weight cutting out the carbs, and he’s enjoying life without diabetes, blah blah blah, but we get to what’s really important here at Celeb Exile.  What you’re really thinking about when you look at the two Drews.  So, let me hear it ladies and gay gentlemen!

Which Drew…would you do?

Are you the type to snuggle with a chubby Drew before an open fire with five sausage and onion deep dish pizzas?  Or are you the type to spoon with new Drew after partaking in measured bites of Fage yogurt and organic blueberries?

So, let me hear it!  Come on down!  Vote!  And no, you can’t choose not to sleep with one of them (or both of them for that matter)!  One must be slept with! 

Which Drew is for you?

–Cap’n Plinkjack

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For Your Friday Viewing Pleasure: In honor of TLAPD.

September 17, 2010 Leave a comment

That’s right, this Sunday is Talk Like A Pirate Day!

And what better way to honor it with one of the worst pirate movies, nay one of the worst movies of all time: Cutthroat Island!

Now, is it so bad? Maybe, maybe not. But it did cost $115 million to make back in 1995 and it made $10 million at the box office. Like a pirate would say…


Yeah, this movie almost single-handedly put its production company out of business. That and Showgirls.

So, dust off ye barnacles, ye bilge rats and be sure to drink some grog this Sunday while saying a wee prayer to Cappy John!


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Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is dead

September 15, 2010 1 comment

Bumble sad...

Well, the voice of Rudolph is dead. Let’s just make that clear.

Billie Mae Richards, who showed up in the credits of the CBS holiday classic as Billy Richards (because you couldn’t have a female voice a male character!) died last week at the age of 88 at her home in Toronto.

A sad day indeed, a Dolly for Sue.

A sad day indeed.

-King Moonracerboy

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