Archive for March, 2010

Independence Day 4-Ever?


It’s looking likely that Will Smith and Roland Emmerich will be getting back together to fight off some pesky aliens in not one Independence Day sequel, but two.

And I think we can all be certain they will be in 3D.

America wants those pecs in three dimensions

It’s not the first time talk of sequels has come up.  Mr. Emmerich has said in the past that if he was to do another Independence Day, it would be broken into two movies titled “ID4-Ever, Parts I & II.”


At least the premise sounded more encouraging with a second invasion taking place in current times.  According to Emmerich the characters would have had time to rebuild and learn from the first invasion with that date holding a 9-11 like significance to them.  Sounds okay I guess.

Just as long as it has Lone Star

Still, let’s remember it might not happen soon (or at all).  Mr. Smith is looking likely to first get on board Men in Black 3 (?) or some movie about cities that move (?!).  And I’m sure Emmerich’s got another box office hit up his sleeve in the meantime.

Like Godzilla!

–Cap’n Blackjack

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OMG Ricky Martin Hates Human Trafficking! Oh, and He's Gay Too

Former memeber of Menudo, Ricky Martin announced on his website today that he is a “fortunate homosexual man,” ending years of speculation on the subject.

Mr. Martin, as I also discovered, is a very charitable man and has set up a foundation to stop human trafficking.  I’ve certainly never heard a contestant on Celebrity Jeopardy name that as their charity before.

So, you tell me.  Which one of this facts is more surprising to you?

This one's for the ladies

–Cap’n Blackjack

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Big screen verison of Laverne and Shirley, written by Jamie Foxx? Yikes.

Hey, who's gonna play us?

Once again, Hollywood has gone to great lengths to scour the vaults in order to avoid coming up with something original. In the more recent past, we’ve seen Starsky and Hutch, Charlie’s Angels and The Dukes of Hazzard, just to name a few. Sure, they do well at the box office but more often than not, these are not the best movies. And here is what Gary Marshall has said so far:

It’s a whole different modern day take on how they came up on the streets during difficult times. Laverne would be this very tough girl with a big ‘L’ tattooed on her arm.


I wish Hollywood would just leave some things alone. The movie industry is having its best year ever so why come up with something like L&S that, unfortunately, I’m sure will do decent in ticket reciepts but that, unfortunately, I’m sure will not be that great of a movie. But what do I know. At least they got one-half of the casting right:



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Roadkill? Let's just make absolutely sure.

It’s offical, humans never cease to amaze. I never, ever thought somebody would attempt this (from CNN):

A Pennsylvania man attempted to resuscitate “a road-killed opossum,” state police say.

But this was one possum who wasn’t playing possum — the ugly creature remained dead.

Troopers responding to the scene in Oliver Township on Thursday determined that Donald J. Wolfe, 55, of Brookville, was drunk, according to the police report.

Ok, so you were drunk, which can be used as a reason for a lot of stupid activity. But seriously, a possum? Out of all the roadkill animals out there, you decide to put your mouth on this marsupial? It’s ugly. At least put your mouth on something less gross, like a fawn or a bunny rabbit, or….

'cute' roadkill.

So, Mr. Wolfe (fitting last name), next time you drink one too many vodka tonics and you come across something in the road that you want to put your mouth on, make sure it’s Hilary Swank first. I guess.


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Hurdy Gurdy Monkey and…Me!

Above is Tony and Coco.  I spent a wonderful afternoon with them this past week.

And I’ll never forget it.

One of only three remaining Organ Grinder/Monkey Entertainment acts in the entire country, Tony and Coco are truly a dying art form.  It’s a shame because I’ve never seen anything like it.

Coco is wheeled out in a festive cart by Tony who’s been doing this sort of thing since 1980.  From there on out, it’s a non-stop barrage of costume changes (Little Richard, Elvis, and Sombrero-wearing Mexican outfits to name a few), parlor tricks, and sports-themed monkey athletics.

It was hilarious, entertaining, and fun.

So, if you like monkeys, or know someone who does, I highly recommend giving Tony a call.  Do it to support this artform.  Or just do it because it will turn an ordinary party into one you’ll never forget.

Here’s the link:

You won’t regret it.

–Cap’n Blackjack

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Smash Mouth Damn Near Ruined My Lunch

And I thought Smash Mouth was out of my life.

I had forgotten about them. I mean, of course I did. They’re Smash Mouth. Who cares? But thanks to the Ninety-Nine (you always come back for more), Muzak, and a speaker right above our heads during lunch, that pointy-haired bastard and his sand n’ surf goons from San Jose came back into my life.

Seriously though. Fuck these guys.

Fuck All Star,

Fuck Can’t Get Enough of the Blah Blah,

And Fuck this shit too.

From here on out, no Smash Mouth. You hear me world? NO. SMASH. MOUTH.

Thank you.

–Cap’n Blackjack SMASH!

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For your Friday viewing pleasure: Darth Stewie

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