Home > Uncategorized > Singing Wait Staff: Welcome to the Island!

Singing Wait Staff: Welcome to the Island!

See the patron in the center getting an ass full? Enjoy your soup!

One thing I enjoy tremendously in life is food. I love to talk about it, I love to cook it and I love to go out and eat it. And when I go out to a restaurant it’s all about the atmosphere, the service and the company and of course the food. Whether it’s Wendy’s or Carrabba’a or Richard’s Bistro (in Manchester, NH—check it out!), I know what I am getting into and I’m okay with that.

But there are some places that every once in a while I don’t realize what I am getting into and it ruins everything: places where the wait staff sings. And they don’t just sing the random Happy Birthday. No, they sing if someone orders the mashed potatoes, the fried mozzarella sticks or they sing because they haven’t sung in the past 15 minutes. SHUT UP! I don’t want a fracking choreographed number with twists and twirls and fake smiles. My dinner roll is getting cold! Plus, this is what my server is doing when I can see the bottom of my martini?! Get me a refill instead of doing the electric slide, will ya!

Texas Roadhouse, stop it. Now. Before I punch one of you in the throat. And I will never again tip at Cold Stone Creamery. Give me my gelato, you off-key Andy Williams wanna-be. Kids might like it but adults don’t. I can handle the talking alligator on the wall at the Outback—at least the reptile retains its dignity and has an accent. So, please, wait staff, go sing somewhere else. Like the Island! Banished!

Sorry for bringing you into this, Andy.


Categories: Uncategorized
  1. The Fish
    December 3, 2009 at 1:04 pm

    Wow someone thinks I’m still relevant to talk about! Thanks Celebrity Exile!

    – Andy Williams

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